Tuesday, June 9, 2009

A Return to Normalcy, the Predictable Type of Chaos - Kerry

The sudden lack of unusual things happening toward the end of May sort of took my breath away. I was struggling to find something to write about when everything was normal, but then I realized that many of the four of you who read this blog may not really know what "normal" means for me. This "normal" is likely to change radically in September, so I have decided to prepare you for what this change will mean.

To begin with, "normal" does not mean "consistent" or "regular." A term was invented during World War II by low ranking members of the military: SNAFU, which means "Situation Normal - All @$#%* Up." I don't actually know how to pronounce that fourth word, but it's supposed to be something really bad ("atdahlerpowndpursentahsturesk" was my best guess). I would say that this aptly describes, and has long described, what "normal" life means for most of us. We struggle toward some semblance of predictability when life arguably has never been predictable for anyone.

I wonder if God even intended for our lives to be predictable and perfectly ordered. A life without change sounds boring. This, incidentally, was an attitude that kept me from being able to look forward to the afterlife when I was a child, because the way it was typically described was as an eternal worship service. I know the praise and worship leaders among you might find this offensive, or even heretical, but that doesn't really sound appealing to me. And my undergraduate degree is in music composition, so I am somewhat favorably disposed toward music, but the eternal mosh pit seems terribly impersonal and static.

Back to the subject at hand. What pattern can be discerned in my life at present typically looks something like this:
  • Monday - Work 8:45 to 5:15, pick up Lara, wash clothes, eat dinner at Subway, group dance lesson.
  • Tuesday - DAY OFF!!! but there are usually things that have to be done, including mowing the lawn, taking care of any car maintenance, playing video games ... you know, necessary stuff.
  • Wednesday - Back to work, sometimes have a private dance lesson.
  • Thursday - Work, sometimes watch a Netflix DVD at home.
  • Friday - Work, get jealous of Lara for being happy that it's Friday
  • Saturday - Work, last minute preparation for Sunday School lesson the next day, sometimes we have a dance to go to.
  • Sunday - Church, which includes teaching a Bible study during the Sunday School hour, teach Hebrew biweekly in the afternoon, chill out at home with Lara for whatever time is left.
To flesh out this skeleton, you must know that our daily commute is 45 minutes one direction. Also, though this has not been consistent by any means, we semi-regularly attend a Bible study with some friends of ours (shout out to Mark and Sheila) one night a week, which is now Tuesday. Also, it seems that every other weekend has some new event or challenge not listed above because there is no discernible order to them.

During May, this outline got all messed up. Because of the intense amount of stress and extra work involved in trying to sort through our belongings and sell them, we dropped the Bible study and group dance lessons. Each evening became much less predictable, and often what we intended to do was trumped by the needs of the immediate. I had not realized how much I drew upon those "extracurricular" activities to anchor me emotionally and give my present situation a sense of direction.

Dancing especially has been vital to my feeling that my life is not absolutely depressing. It has given me an artistic, physical, and competitive outlet and has introduced me to a number of new friends. It has also taught Lara and me a great deal about each other and our dynamic as a couple. Learning to be a strong communicator through subtle pressures in my arms and torso has been one of hardest and most rewarding things I've ever done. Sure, sometimes I have to resort to the drill sergeant style of ballroom dance leading with some dance partners ("LEFT ... RIGHT ... SIDE TOGETHER ... LEFT ... RIGHT ... SIDE TOGETHER ... ABOUT FACE ... PRESENT ARMS"), but this is getting more and more rare.

Things are not completely as they were before May, though. The closer we get to September, the more inadequate I feel, academically speaking. I have embarked on a comprehensive review of Hebrew and German, which will be followed by Aramaic, Ugaritic, Akkadian, Egyptian, and Greek, and I am reading everything I can that includes the "Old Testament Theology" in the title. I sometimes feel amazed that the University of Edinburgh accepted me, but accept me they did - I just got the visa letter this week.

One aspect of my life which has been fairly regular is Logos, my Sunday morning Bible study class. Having finished a study of Revelation a few weeks ago, we have begun to study Genesis, and I am spending a great deal of time reading commentaries and translating the pertinent portions. Just recently I was reading chapter three in Hebrew while on a break at Lifeway when I realized, ironically, that I was eating an apple. Suddenly it struck me that if Adam and Eve had been meat-eaters instead of vegetarians we might still be in Eden. I'm sure many of you have heard the first few chapters of Genesis used to support a vegetarian diet, particularly by Christian dietitians trying to sell their books and proprietary vitamin supplements (which become all the more necessary since their diets have eliminated some nutrients most abundantly found in meat). What I think is funny is that if Adam and Eve and eaten only meat, we wouldn't even be in this mess. We might all be fat, have high blood pressure, and smell bad, but there wouldn't be war. Instead, they eat fruit and look what happens. The love of fruit, then, is the root (or shall we more appropriately say seed) of all kinds of sins. I made this observation to a coworker who was in the break room with me. "But I like fruit," she responded.

Yes. Don't we all.

3 comments:

  1. Nothing was dead in the Garden of Eden, nothing. No animals were killed to be eaten. I see this as meat and animals causing a lot of our dietary problems in america, along with processed foods, but that is just me and my journey. Raw foods, fruits and veggies are the best things we can eat..organic of course. Not to down your philosophy or anything, i think you have a point to some degree, but God also gave us a brain to know good and evil.

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  2. I was afraid the sarcasm might not come across. Try rereading, understanding my tongue to be firmly in my cheek.

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  3. Sarcasm's not for everybody. Neither is fruit.

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